Life has a funny way of teaching us things when we least expect it, like breaking a foot and being forced to sit still. Some days, that’s all I can do—sit with my thoughts and process what’s going on. But that’s where emotional growth really comes into play, especially for those of us who’ve had more ups and downs than we care to admit.
Understanding Emotional Growth
Emotional growth is like climbing a mountain—there are good days when you feel like you’re making progress, and then there are days when it feels like you're sliding back down to the bottom. But here’s the thing: it’s not about getting to the top quickly, it’s about becoming more aware of yourself along the way. The process of emotional growth isn’t linear, and that’s okay. It’s the learning that counts.
As Garraway (2020) explains in Resilient Man: Conquer Self-Sabotage and Embrace Emotional Vulnerability, real growth happens when we embrace our vulnerability rather than hide from it. For men, this can be a tough pill to swallow. We’re often taught to bottle things up, but in reality, emotional growth begins when we stop pretending we have it all together and start doing the hard work of digging into what’s really going on inside.
Personal Reflections
I’ve been through my share of emotional challenges—heck, just thinking back on my time at Standing Rock reminds me of how much I learned about resilience, not just physically but emotionally. Standing up for what’s right, being a part of something bigger than myself, and processing the weight of those experiences—it’s all part of the growth. And fatherhood? Don't even get me started. Being a dad, and now a Papa, has been the biggest crash course in emotional growth I’ve ever had. It’s forced me to be patient, empathetic, and strong in ways I never imagined. But man, it’s been worth every lesson.
We all hit roadblocks, and sometimes those come from our past—old wounds that haven’t quite healed yet. Hollis (1994), in Under Saturn’s Shadow, talks about how men carry this shadow, this weight of unresolved pain from childhood, into adulthood. That’s where the real work begins. It’s not enough to acknowledge the pain; we have to learn from it, grow beyond it, and turn it into something that makes us better.
Call to Action
So, here’s my challenge to you: take some time today to reflect on your own emotional growth. Where are you in your journey? Are you still carrying old hurts, or are you learning from them? We can’t move forward if we’re stuck in the past, so let’s do the hard work. Journaling, meditating, talking with a mentor—these are simple steps, but they make all the difference.
And remember, we’re in this together. Whether you're a father, a brother, or a friend, we all need each other’s support. As Beaton (2020) highlights in Men’s Work, community is key to this process. Find your tribe and lean into the support they offer. That’s where real growth happens—in connection, not isolation.
Conclusion
Emotional growth isn’t about perfection, and it’s certainly not about avoiding pain. It’s about learning, healing, and evolving—every single day. So let’s keep climbing that mountain together. It’s a lifelong journey, but the view from the top is always worth it.
Works Cited
Beaton, C. (2020). Men's work: A practical guide to face your darkness, end self-sabotage & find freedom. Sounds True.
Garraway, R. (2020). Resilient man: Conquer self-sabotage and embrace emotional vulnerability. Men's Health Publishing.
Hollis, J. (1994). Under Saturn’s shadow: The wounding and healing of men. Inner City Books.
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